Comrade Profile Part 5; A Life Across The Hall From Mr. Spiker

There are few people who can say that they have decent relationships with their siblings. And for a long time I didn't. Spending three years as an only child, I never really grew out of that selfish phase, but I always had to deal with the fact that because I was older, I had to be a role model and be responsible. In other words, I had to be a big brother. So, then began the life of sharing and hanging out with someone who I had to be nice to. Weird concept, I know.

So, for the first few years, we shared a room. We had bunkbeds, which was always pretty cool. Our room was always trashed, and our parents always wanted us to clean up, but we didn't. I'm pretty sure we didn't see the carpet of that room for a good 6 years due to Ninja Turtle, Ghostbuster, and random McD's toys scattered in an uncomfortable version of broken glass. I'd say it was a pretty good setup.

But I got older, and that selfish older brother who suddenly became embarassed by everything kicked in. I wanted my own room. I opted to take the room across the hall, which was half the size of the shared room. But it was mine, and I stopped being roommates with the younger sibling who at the same time I started to quarrel with daily.

There were almost always fights about things kids fight about, which I realize now were entirely my fault. Jesse smashed my legos. That was because I had all the cool legos and left him with the pirates and cops, while the spacemen and underwater dudes ruled my army. I had the cool ninja turtles and their villains, while he got X-man who was missing one arm and Baxter Stockman, sans wings (although he almost always picked Mondo Gecko, who was a pretty sick character).

But even through these stupid fights about childish things, there was always a sense of pride I took in being a big brother. I believe if you asked a one David Valderama about his bloody nose, he can account for that. Whenever we would fight with the neighbor boys (who lived next door for a year, maybe), my brother was left out of the neighborhood fun. So, in standing up for him, I take a punch to the head, which leads to a one David Valderama getting his nose flattened, leaving the Spiker boys to rule the neighborhood.

Now we're adults, and in the last few years, through all the shit, Jesse has been a huge support. When I take myself too seriously, Jesse is there to knock me down a few pegs. And I would say that his newly discovered wit and charm would rival that of a Ryan Reynolds Van Wilder interpretation. I haven't been the best brother over the years, but no matter what, I'd say that Jesse has always been the kind of brother someone would want in their life.

So, I'm sorry for the shit, and I'm glad we're related, most of the time. I can be a dick, but you keep me in check. I'd tell you I'd love you, but after living a life across the hall from Mr. Spiker, I'd say that might be a bit "Mikeysexual."